Oprah's Forgiveness Quote

"Forgiveness - giving up the hope that the past could have been any different."


Not a complete definition of forgiveness, but a thought-provoking way to look at it. Thanks Milissa/Oprah.

Keeping Busy

Yep, between my part-time job, going to chiro appts, working on stuff for my sister's wedding, going to gym,  doing a little gardening, reading for school (in advance of next semester) and spending time with friends, I've been keeping busy. My back has been doing much better these past few weeks, with ups/downs. My chiropractor is currently out of the country so I am "going without" for the next week and hope that I don't do anything stupid to it in the interim. Once in a while I'll feel a twinge, but all in all, much better.

Still trying to arrange for a visit to a local prison this summer (did I mention this before?) where I can see first hand how healthcare works in the prison. I've been in touch with a doctor who works a lot of hours there in the summer, but nothing has materialized yet. I'm patient, but my summer is zooming away quickly.

I had hoped to do some furniture refinishing this summer, but that's been put on hold because of my back. Definitely not important enough to risk muscle spasms.

One of my nursing school friends has invited me and the other woman in our summer study group to go to the beach in NC for a few days over the weekend after July 4 and stay at her dad's beach house. Would be really nice to get away - and there would be less expenses without having to pay for place to stay. Gas and food mainly.  I'd have to give up a week of my part-time job (she's flexible) and would need to consider how it would impact wedding planning as invites will probably need to be mailed out a few days after I'd get back. Hopefully it will all work out.

Well, that's all for now... gonna head to the gym.

It's a Good Thing

Today I met with my physician for a follow up appt (from before Haiti trip) and asked if she'd give me a referral to our local ACAC's PREP program (Physician Referred Exercise Program) in light of my concerns about starting back into an exercise regime with my present back issues. She said she thought it was a great idea!  (I will admit that when I started seeing commercials for this program a few years ago...I thought it was primarily for old people or with people who were recovering from heart attacks or dealing with diabetes). 

So with the PREP program I'll get 60 days of full membership at this gym including meeting 2x/week with their medical staff (or that's how I understand it) for $60 total. I'll have full membership and will have access to classes, pool, basketball courts (!), etc... outside of times with the medical staff. Normally I would never be able to afford their monthly fee (over $80/month), so this is really ideal. Once my 60 days are over, I will just take what I've learned and transfer it over to the fitness rooms on campus (no pool or classes--but FREE).  This might be the best $60 I'll spend this summer... oh wait...that prescription of muscle relaxants was an awfully good purchase too... Okay, so this will be the best $60 investment! 

I'm excited about this. I think the accountability with my physician and the PREP team will be a good thing. And while I prefer running outdoors, it's hard to stay motivated when starting back running --while facing the three H's (heat, humidity and hills), so I'm looking forward to use of the treadmills for my interval training.

With this added commitment I totally need to sit down and make a realistic weekly schedule that includes the gym, chiro appts, school time, wedding planning, part-time job, plus the FUN stuff I'm supposed to be doing this summer too. =)

Later Taters...

 

Semester Three | Final Grades

I was in Haiti when final grades were posted. We had wireless, but it was pretty flaky and so it took multiple tries to access grades via the Blackboard app on my iPod Touch. Email was practically impossible because the outgoing email config and the local network didn't like each other. Accessing internet was a touch better, but not enough to access gmail directly. Facebook app was by far the best communication tool I had. Somehow I could upload photos via the FB app, but could not access gmail reliably. I had hoped to post something here at least once, but trying to post a coherent blog entry using my iPod Touch keyboard wasn't exactly my idea of fun.

But the good news is that I got A's on my final exams and that was enough to bump up my final course grades to A's. For both classes! Granted it was by the skin of my teeth that I got those A's, but I'm so thrilled! Starting the semester I really thought that taking two classes this semester would mean B's. It was a TOUGH semester, but I worked my butt off. And despite my low expectations for myself, the hard work paid off. A good lesson learned amid a positive outcome!

My back was a big issue in Haiti. Sleeping was pretty miserable. I think I changed what I was sleeping on 3x. Despite having slept on my air mattress here at home for the week proceeding Haiti, my back would have none of it. Doing the exercises prescribed by my chiropractor proved difficult because of space, pain and our schedule. I think it must've been my 3rd day there, in the middle of clinic, that one of the physicians on the team suggested taking a muscle relaxant. I was like "We have some???"  Wonderful. So the first one I tried was Flexeril (cyclobenzaprine). I slept great as it has a sedative side effect, but I woke up in excruciating pain. So the next morning I started taking Robaxin (methocarbamol) along with ibuprofen and that really seemed to do the trick.  My back felt remarkably good (much less pain) this past weekend since I had been on Robaxin continuously, but I'm feeling increased pain again now that I am not taking it. I was given enough to get home and have a day or so of coverage, but I decided to hold off taking it as soon as I got home and just save the few pills I have for when it's really bad (or for my chiropractic days). I am not scheduled to see my physician until mid-June (for blood work and annual TB test--for nursing school) and would prefer not to go in simply for a prescription--but I may have to. My hope is that now that I'm back in my own bed, not enduring airports/airplane seating, not hunched over textbooks that my back will be less stressed. However, unpacking is pretty unpleasant and in a couple days I will be stuck in a car for 8 hours. Yeesh.

All I know is that I NEED to get my back healthy again before fall. I simply cannot go into clinicals with my back in spasms. I also am going to focusing on dropping 20 lbs this summer, but need to be a cautious with my back. Those first few days of starting back into any new exercise regime is always a miserable experience. I'm hoping that running will actually make my back happy and not angry--but need to play it very safe. Money is tight, so I can't be hiring a trainer or coach either.

The other reality that I'm facing is that I really need to make some money this summer to refill my dwindling savings account. Someway, somehow. I have a lead on a possible day job providing care for a quadriplegic in his home but they live probably 45 minutes from my house. That's a lot of time and gas! It's not the best money as it would be at a medicare rate for a non-licensed caregiver, but it could be really great experience and something I could put on my resume. But again my priority is taking care of my back!

I will post something soon about my Haiti trip. I'm busy unpacking and putting away stuff and also need to subdue the gigantic nursing school pile on the dining room table!

One Year Down, One Year To Go

Yay! I'm done! I've officially completed my first year of nursing school! Woot! Won't know final grades until next week sometime. But Haiti will be a wonderful distraction. (Although I *think* I did pretty well).

Thankfully that random icky feeling has disappeared. Now I'm just left with my back pain. sigh.  I *should* be spending my time packing tonight, but I'm so tired and my back hurts. It's been a full day on only four hours of sleep. Walking around the house bending over to pick up stuff off the floor and move it somewhere else is not my idea of fun! Thankfully I did run a bunch of errands this evening, but I have no motivation to do any packing. I've probably got way too much stuff--but that's because I like to be prepared. But what I have to keep reminding myself is that I'm only going for a week...not a year. And if I forget something...it's not the end of the world...well okay, if I forgot my camera, I'd be pretty annoyed with myself.  

Well, to bed I go...chiropractor appt in the morning...then a full out packing mission.

Can't remember the last time I felt really icky...

Wow, I feel icky. Not exactly nauseous, but a vague discomfort in my upper abdomen and a not-quite headache. And kinda sorta, but not really, clammy or diaphoretic yet (low blood sugar?). Yesterday I switched to taking off-brand Excedrine (aspirin, caffeine, acetaminophen) for my pain--just to see if it would be better than the ibuprofen. I felt fine all day and then last night as I was studying (after 11pm), this general icky feeling came on. I went to bed about 2am after eating a dozen saltine crackers (hoping maybe I was just hungry). But I woke up with same feeling. Pain med should be long gone from my stomach by now. Hmm? Maybe I've finally done it. Maybe I've finally taken enough ibuprofen/aspirin in the last two weeks to give myself an ulcer? Lovely. Well, I guess I'll go try to hunt down some antacids and see if that makes any improvement. And no, I'm not pregnant. No chance of that. Abdominal aneurysm cross my mind but--that's only because I'm a nursing student and prone to think of all the worse-case scenarios!

I'm planning to take my LAST final exam this morning--so this is not boding well for a great performance (and I was going to get up and study a bit more this morning). *sigh*  Plus after my exam, I'm supposed to be heading off to be a standardized patient for 4 hours this afternoon. But my biggest concern is, HOW LONG is this ickyness going to hang around? My biggest concern is that I'm flying out for Haiti this weekend!

Well, I best go and pull myself together: Wash face, eat breakfast, find antacid and do quick review of the notes I didn't get to look at last night. Heck, maybe it's just gas?  :/

Hopefully a better report later.

Not in Charge

One thing about being jammed up right before leaving for Haiti, is that I am completely relying on my team leaders to figure everything out for the team. Every other time I've been on an international mission trip, I have had some sort of team leadership/administration function (Ireland and Liberia x3).

This morning I finally was looking online to see recommendations for arrival time at airport. Dulles suggests three hours for international flights, which means I need to get to leave 3-ish to get to airport for my 6am flight! Yeesh! Thankfully my sister lives only 20 minutes from the airport. However, American Airlines again suggests three hours when departing from Port-au-Prince.  So our flight is at 9ish Saturday morning. So that means getting to the airport about 6ish. Well that's all fine and dandy except we are staying in Gonavies, which I think is a 3 hour drive from PaP!  So again, it seems that I'll be headed to airport at 3AM. I'm so glad someone else is worrying about this. 

So yesterday my back felt a bit better for having gone off Allegra. But this morning I woke up and my back was BURNING!  I'm really puzzled. Does it really take several days for Allegra to leave the body, or are my nerves really just this irritated?  I have not been able to get the pain under control today with ibuprofen or Excedrine.  Last night, like the past week and a half, I have slept on my air mattress --the one going with me to Haiti. But last night I took the mattress downstairs and slept on it IN the mosquito tent. I was too tired to go upstairs to get a legitimate blanket and just grabbed a fuzzy warm lap/throw blanket. I was COLD all night long. So I'm guessing, that in the midst of trying to stay warm, I probably did not have very good sleeping posture/alignment.  So it's hard to say what exactly exacerbated things. *sigh*  And tonight I'm planning to sleep on my regular mattress/bed while my mosquito net airs out (from Permethrin treatment), so again I'm adding another "change" into the mix. This is just really frustrating. So glad to be going to chiropractor tomorrow to get stretch out again.

Okay, so I'm glad I'm not in charge of Haiti trip details...but I sure wish I could do something about my back issue. Mercy!!!!