Long Weekend

Sigh.

After a long holiday weekend, WHO wants to study? I mean, really?  I had every intention of studying over Thanksgiving Break for my tests this coming week. I even dragged my books and laptop to Ohio. I probably only managed 3 hours in the car on the way up. And even that wasn't that fruitful. I was just having too much fun with my family that I was not going to sequester myself away to study and miss out on all the fun. No way!  My parents and I pulled into their driveway yesterday afternoon (after 7 hour drive from Ohio) and I stayed to watched the second half of the Virginia Tech/UVA game (Go Hokies!). Afterwards I drove home, but was not in the mood to study, so  instead I popped in a 2 part Hallmark Movie. I watched the first part and then went to bed. I had big hopes of getting to the gym and to church this morning with school work all afternoon, but alas, I skipped the gym and did get to church where I bumped into friends and we went out to lunch. Then of course I needed to finish Part 2 of the movie. haha. So much for getting any studying done this weekend. So here I am AGAIN. Procrastinating. I guess tomorrow I'll spend the day cramming for the Psych test on Tuesday morning. Then I'll spend the rest of Tuesday and all day Wednesday cramming for the Med-Surg test on Thursday. The Med-Surg test might kick my butt-seeing as it covers topics of Renal Disorders, Burns and Shock and it felt like we RAN through the material in class...I sure hope I absorbed some of it.  But thankfully clinicals are over-so the time I'd normally be in clinical, I'll be spending that time studying for lecture tests.

On Thursday (Thankgiving morning) my sisters and I went for a 5 mile run together. My mom and one of my brother-in-laws came along too-- but they did their own thing while the sisters ran together. I have not run in ages, but I was able to keep up--which was a nice surprise! But boy, did I wake up sore the next morning! Today is the first day I haven't groaned going down stairs. So I guess despite regular elliptical and cycle use at the gym, my running muscles have been neglected. So I'm thinking I will be adding running back into my gym work-out. Maybe one day a week. However, once I graduate in May, I'll be starting back to running more regularly and will be making a plan for my first marathon (goal is before I turn 40). Even though my leg muscles are much happier today, my lower back is a bit unhappy. Not sure if it was the running OR if it was because I was sleeping on an air mattress while in Ohio. Hopefully it will calm back down once I get back to the gym.

Oh, I almost forgot. Remember the contest at the gym? 8 pounds in 8 weeks? Well, I did it! Yay! So I'll be getting my $20 back and hopefully more $$. I ate VERY well over Thanksgiving weekend - so I'm sure I gained back a few pounds. Haha! But back to the gym this week.

It's the Little Things

There's nothing more satisfying to a nursing student than marking days off in the final month of the semester. This week, I got to cross off a couple things.

1. Monday: Psychopathology paper turned in.
2. Tuesday: Last clinical prep for Med-Surg.
3. Wednesday: Last Med-Surg clinical (yay!)
4. Thursday: Last lecture for Med-Surg

As of today, I have one remaining Psych clinical day (Monday), two more Psych lecture days, Test 3 in both Psych and Med-Surg (lecture tests) and then Final Exams in both Psych and Med-Surg. 

My hope had been to start working through the Study Guides yesterday - in hopes that I'd have them ALL (for Psych and Med-Surg) ready, so that I can take them with me to my Thanksgiving destination for reviewing and studying. After Thanksgiving, I have Test 3 in both Psych and Med-Surg... so rather than working on the Study Guides during thanksgiving, it would be better to have them done so that I can actually STUDY them. I'm sure I'll still drag my textbooks with me (just in case I need to look something up), but it's nice to be able to sit and read my study guides and powerpoints from lecture. Plus having Study Guides completed, I can take them with me to the gym easily.

HOWEVER, last night I stayed with a friend's dog overnight while they were out of town and I woke up with sneezing and runny/stuffy nose. My hope had been that it was just allergies from the dog- as it's been a long while since I've stayed with a long-haired dog. But I left the house this morning (cancelled work) and went home straight to bed. Took an antihistamine and a decongestant and been sucking on zinc lozenges. I'm pretty sure I'm dealing with a cold - and not allergies. If it was allergies, I think just removing myself from the situation would have been enough. It's for sure that I've not been getting adequate sleep for the past semester. Between long nights of clinical prep and papers due and getting up early and going to the gym...I'm lucky to be averaging 6 hours of sleep a night - if that. And I can also see where I've been getting a bit more sugar than I normally do - specifically increased Hot Chocolate!!! And on Wednesday I had 2 tall glasses of lemonade when our clinical group when out to eat. Plus I think my immune strength naturally dips at the beginning of my menstrual cycle. So the stars aligned, as they say, and I got sucker punched. I'd say this is probably the best weekend for me to get sick since I don't really have anything pressing or due and I don't have to be anywhere. 

However it's a bummer to be going into the Thanksgiving holiday knowing I may end up coughing and feeling a bit miserable. But hey, perhaps since I started this thing today...that by Wednesday I'll be feeling a lot better. Hopefully the zinc will cut the cold. Also, my chiropractor suggests breathing in/out of nose while having a blowing hairdryer (on warm setting) pointed at nose for 2-3 minutes several times a day (another site said 20 minutes each time). It really did make my nose feel better for a while. I also remembered that earlier this year, when I was suffering with allergies, I purchased, but never used, a NeilMed Sinus rinse system (similar to the nettipot). So this afternoon I pulled out the directions and tried it. Not a bad experience...just new...will take time learning to use it. I know people who SWEAR by saline rinses. And after having used it, my nose has remained clear for the past hour. They say you'll find benefit to use it twice a day, but that you can use it more than twice, but might not find anymore improvement - perhaps just comfort. Hey the comfort factor alone makes it worth it! I think the biggest thing I need to do is to chug water/fluids and that will hopefully keep things out of my chest/lungs.

I had planned to get up early this morning and head to gym before work, but I slept through my alarm and then woke up feeling crappy. Tomorrow is my weekly weigh-in for the weight loss program at my gym. The contest that I'm in (8 pounds in 8 weeks) ends next Wednesday before Thanksgiving. I've been doing okay, but been a little behind my goals each week. But last weigh in, put me at exactly 6 pounds lost in 6 weeks--which you'd think would have me on target. BUT because I'm a Saturday weigh-in, this contest is really only 7.5 weeks for me because it ends before Thanksgiving. So, my plan had been to step up my workouts and see if I could pull it off. I had even gone so far as scheduling 2 hour workouts this weekend - instead of just one hour. But now that I'm sick, it looks like I'll miss my workout for today completely. It doesn't help that I've been PMS-eating this week either (despite my goal to eliminate unnecessary snacks). When I'm sick, I don't have much of an appetite (especially when sucking on zinc lozenges!) so perhaps that will counter my lack of exercise? I'm kinda feeling like there's no chance I'm going to make the 8 lb. goal on Tuesday - when I do my final weigh-in before leaving town. But I'm not going to give up. There's still a chance!! Would love to win some $$ (split among those who make the 8 lb goal), and of course will be glad that I worked hard to lose 8 lbs. However, I'm definitely going to chill out and give my body a break after this contest. The stress of school, little sleep, and working out so much - are likely why my immune system crashed. My body's way of saying "Hey you! Chill out!"  

I won't drop work-outs all together, cause that would be stupid, but may drop back to only three cardio days a week, instead of four. And I might take a hiatus from my beloved aquatic classes so that I can get an extra hour of sleep those mornings--especially once the semester ends and I'm not heading to class those days. Once the semester ends, I'll be working four days a week at the distribution center job over Christmas break- which will have me walking/climbing ladders for 8 hours a day. So... just so long as I stick to taking my lunch to work with me (and not eating out - which is fun to do with the seasonal hires) and get four workouts in a week, I'll probably continue to lose slowly or at least maintain. Maybe I'll find that I'll lose more, as perhaps I've been over doing the workouts? We shall see.

Since I didn't work on Study Guides last night (instead I went and helped out with an activity for first year nursing students) and I haven't done anything but rest today, I think I'm going to pop a movie in and start working on Study Guides tonight. And get to bed at a decent hour tonight (if I can sleep after napping for 4 hours today). Depending on how I'm feeling at 6 am, I might get up and go workout, otherwise I'll sleep in and just go to the gym for my weigh-in and maybe a late work out. 

Until Later,

Joy

Grateful

This afternoon in our Psych post-conference started noticing slight changes in my vision field. Yep, migraine with aura. It takes a while for the visual symptoms to pass, so I endured post-conference discussion and then hung around awhile after everyone else left. My clinical instructor, who also has an evening clinical group tonight, hung around and we chatted a bit. At one point she asked me something like "So, how has this semester been for you?" I further clarified that she was talking about our Psych clinical and not second year in general. I stopped and thought and replied, "It has made me so grateful." At which point the waterworks started. Not sobbing, but you know that point where every choked word is punctuated by fresh, hot tears?


This pysch nursing clinical has been so different from every other clinical. We aren't dealing with medical issues like we see in our med-surg clinicals. The acute needs we are seeing are primarily psychiatric. I have read and heard such heart-breaking histories of abuse, alcoholism, drugs, rape, homelessness, and jail. I can't help but be grateful for my sheltered, stress-free childhood where love was the theme for both good days and bad days. Punishment and consequences were love-oriented and never abusive or absent. And my choices in life have reflected that for the most part.


For the past ten to fifteen years, I've often looked back and wondered impatiently why my hopes, dreams for my life did not work out as planned or expected. But today I am just simply grateful. I have a good life, a VERY good life. Relatively unmessy and uncomplicated. My family is supportive, loving and healthy- not without our moments, of course. And even though I still have unmet hopes and dreams, these have become less big and less painful in the light of the stories I have heard and read about this past semester. I am counting my blessings. 

Relieved

Okay, so my last post was full of whining and complaining (probably a bit of PMS)...but I am happy to report that I did NOT receive two patients to prep for. Other folks in my clinical did. Now I'm wondering if she'll try to throw two patients at me next week (our last clinical day). Hopefully not as we ALL really want to have an easy day that includes leaving floor early and enjoying lunch as a clinical group (tradition). I think tomorrow we are going to revisit next week's lunch plans with our clinical instructor.

Anyways, I'm REALLY hoping and expecting to get to bed at a decent hour tonight! Yes!

Still Hanging In

Things are crazy right now, that's why I haven't posted lately. Written assignments, tests and more written assignments are keeping me busy. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Only two med-surg clinical days left. Actually, I should say, two clinical PREP days left -one of which is tomorrow. Prep days are the worse. Caring for patients...so much more enjoyable then prepping for them. Last week I was assigned two patients. The prep was ugly and I got about an hour of sleep. Not fun. Not right. But it's over. Or so we thought. Everyone in my clinical has been assigned two patients (half one week, half the other). Last week my clinical instructor told us she'd be randomly assigning double patients to some of us (again). NONE of us want it the first time, because NONE of us want the extra paperwork and the sleep deprivation and the repercussions of no sleep that continue to affect us (or at least me) even two days later. The stupid part about all of this is... that having two patients was apparently not required, but my clinical instructor REQUIRED it. And we were also told that our two patients would be non-complicated. Yeh, right. I'm on a cardio-thoracic post-surgical floor. Of course they are going to be complicated! The course coordinator even told her clinical group to let her know if they wanted two patients and doesn't seem like she will be requiring her group to do two patients. Well, I'm pretty sure our clinical group is NOT the envy of anyone else. It sucks.  Last week, caring for two patients wasn't a big deal and even having to give meds for one of them wasn't a big deal...but doing the prep just made me want to shout obscenities and to whine and complain. But I didn't. I sucked it up and was a big girl -- despite wanting to complain endlessly.  But if I get assigned two patients tomorrow, I think I might just have to go to my clinical instructor and say, "I'm sorry, I respectfully decline. I simply cannot have another night of no sleep. Last week's sleep deprivation made it difficult to prepare adequately for my other classes and do my other classwork. Two patients are not being required of any other clinical groups, and if it looks poorly on me that I'm requesting to prep for only one patient, then so be it. There's also the "do no harm" aspect. I'm not sure I can properly care for my patients on one hour of sleep."  Thank you very much.

Don't get me wrong. I am NOT trying to wiggle of extra clinical work. I don't mind caring for two patients. It is all about losing sleep b/c I'm up prepping for two patients. I have learned so much from my clinical instructor this semester. She really knows her stuff...and that's what I WANT in a clinical instructor. But requiring us to do extra when none of the other clinical groups are being required, really is unfair. And not right. Those folks are more rested going into clinical. They have the energy to do homework and prepare for lecture the next day, they might even go to the gym.  On Tuesdays I get up about 5:30, get my crap together and go to the gym before lecture...then I'm up all night prepping...then head to clinical with maybe an hour of sleep. I am wasted come 2:30 when we leave clinical. Let's see, how many hours have I been up? Maybe 33 hours with one hour of shut-eye. Who can manage to go read a text book after that? Mercy. I end up crashing for a couple hours, then get up and evaluate my careplans and meds and do self-evaluation of my day for a few hours...and then back to bed. Last week I even slept through my alarm for my Thursday morning aquatic class. Boo!

So needless to say, I'm not going to be happy if she assigns me two patients tomorrow. And it will take everything within me to not go to her and attempt to decline. I really wonder what her response would be if I ask her to only assign one patient. The struggle is that I actually LIKE this unit (compared to my other clinical experiences) and might consider applying to work there and in that case, it would only make sense that I ask her to be a reference. But I'm completely TORN. How can I decline second patient and still maintain my clinical instructors "respect" to get  a good recommendation/reference - at least as much as is possible for a nursing student.

Tomorrow I will get last week's paperwork returned, so we'll see by her grading if she's ticked off at those of us who followed the course coordinator's instructions for prepping for second patient). Last week she wasn't particularly happy with us -- but perhaps she's since gone back to the coordinator to get clarification. If had done as she'd asked, I'd still not have finished-and would not have gotten that one hour of "sleep".

Tomorrow will be a long day regardless of whether I'm assigned two patients or not. I'm considering skipping my aquatic class to go vote. Otherwise I have to get up extra early to vote. Sigh.

In good news... I got a 98 on my my most recent test. I have no idea how that happened. Honestly did not even hope for that. I was hoping for low A, high B.

So the REALLY good news is, that I only have to survive Med-Surg clinical prep and clinical this week and next and then that will be over. I only have two Psych clinicals left (last one is the Monday before Thanksgiving). It's always REALLY nice to have clinicals done and to be able to focus on studying for Test 3 and Final Exams. Getting close.

One last gripe. Typically on the last clinical day of the semester, each clinical group with their instructors will head out early and go out to eat for lunch. It's been this way for every clinical I've had. However when we mentioned this to my Med-Surg clinical instructor (who is a first-time clinical instructor for my program) did not seem like she was aware of this tradition or else does not support this. It was like she plans for our last clinical day to be like every other clinical day. She said we could possibly bring lunch to the unit. Um, yeh. NOT! Are you kidding me? I think she was more concerned with the fact that she is planning to work the 3-11 shift AFTER our clinical. In my head, I'm thinking, "um, this is NOT about you...it's about us, about celebrating survival of another clinical semester! It's about being social and enjoying spending time outside the clinical setting."  She graduated from our nursing program about 5-7 years ago, you'd think she'd remember what it was like? I dunno. I think there's some pride issues going on and a desire to prove how bad-ass she is.    It doesn't help that she's a clinical instructor for us on the same unit that she works everyday (although in other ways that IS a benefit!)  I really wish she'd let down her hair, so that we aren't always pulling out our hair.

Okay, enough said.

Probably said too much.

But I'm venting.

You get that, right?